Warning: fat whining ahead.

I must be one of the few guys on this planet who likes to shop. Today I decided to prepare my wardrobe for another bloody winter: warm socks, warm trousers and a new winter jacket.

So I went to my usual sources for elephant outfits. I am a fat guy, not American übersize, but still too fat. So I have to go and buy at least XXXL to fit into.

The reason why most fat people look terrible in their fat clothes is not just their size, but because most oversized stuff looks awful. Instead of smart designs that offer some decent looks and maybe hide the visual clues of fattienes you get horribly ugly stuff. I especially despise brightly coloured threads and wastelines that makes it easy to spot my fattiest lifestyle from a hundred miles away. Thank you so much!

Today I raided at least five big department stores with with special fattiest sections, who offered everything from supercheap to superexpensive, from no-name products to established brands.

All in all, very disappointing and EXPENSIVE. I don’t mind paying 200+ Euros for a decent jacket, but not not 300 Euros and beyond. Especially if it has your brand’s name stitched on my chest or even worse my back. And because it is plus sized you have to pay extra compared to the normal sizes - that’s what I call the fatty tax.

Once again my last resort was the Army surplus shop. A black jacket, two extremely colourful trousers and six T-shirts for €160. All elephant size, all in that distinct military look.

When I have to wear ugly stuff - at least I want it cheap and durable. Fuck designer clothes if they also look ugly and only want to promote themselves for many Euros.

Anyone out there who want to pay a liposuction for xmas for me?