Oh honey - just wait till the kids are gone - then I’ll get a divorce and party my brains out.
The possibilities of women have changed tremendously in the last 60 years.
Overall women have benefited the most from the sexual revolution and the new equality. Men lost their traditional "advantages" based on their gender - and they are less adaptable and flexible when it comes to our modern work environment and it’s "softer" requirements like team play, flexibility, communication, learning and emotional intelligence.
But women have also suffered from the new form of social fabric: they are now biggest number of single parents - responsible for raising and funding our kids.
The Pyramid is flipping
People between 35 and 45 are the most populous group in many western countries. (Click image to pop the pyramid.)
In recent decades the good old population pyramid has basically flipped 180° - and now we have more mature and old people in western societies than we have young ones. We are becoming grey societies. (By the way: you can get population pyramids for many countries here)
So the fortysomethings are the biggest group in the population right now.
Plus the longer life expectancy, single lifestyle and overall youth cult have made the fortysomethings the new players in town: they have money, they are still horny and active. And their grown up egos are much more neurotic and hungry for self gratification.
The most active consumer group here are mature women. Many of them now are shedding their kids, because they are grown up now. So they want to "party extra hard" and make up for all the time they were dedicated mothers and wives.
Plus the modern western cities are more streamlined for the new single lifestyle - and they are the majority now. Families used to "rule" the cities - but that has changed during the 90’s. It’s now single all the way - or better "serial monogamizers" (people who hop from one fast relationship to the next one).
So our cities are a huge playground for the mature ladies.
Pimp my Skin - or why the Beauty Industry loves fortysomething women
Does this pop video make me look old?
The beauty and fashion industry has long discovered this rich and often desperate clientele: the cream for the skin at forty, the pill for the rotten brain at forty, etc.
The message here is: you are still adorable, but you need a tune up. Albeit an expensive one.
Behind all this is the ugly face of infertility. All primary "beauty" spots - red lips, beautiful hair, smooth skin, wide eyes - are signs of health and therefore fertility. A good looking women is most of all a fertile women.
Forty is the Magic Age - the last call for babies. But it is also the age of a new form of competition: you are fading out of the beauty competition - you are no longer the hottest chick in town, you already show some defects and there is fresher meat on sale.
Our society has just developed a "mature concept" for beauty and sexuality, but overall we do not appreciate the beauty and wisdom of older ladies as they are. We only have "Venus" measurement: either you are a young fertile love goddess or you are not.
Our definition what’s hot or not is still deeply ingrained in our biological code: only healthy breeding material is sexy.
The MILF-Syndrome
Mature Bitches rule the Suburbs!
That brings us to the overall sexualization of age. Since Viagra was released the pressure was on - there was no longer an excuse for guys not too perform - so the ladies also had to joining the gray swingers club.
But the sexualization of mature women goes further: TV series like "Sex in the City" and "Desperate Housewives" are both part of the wider "MILF" syndrome (MILF = Mothers I’d like to fuck).
This is a new sex trend as well media frenzy: mature hot looking women who are oversexed and fuck anything that moves - plus the additional drama this behavior causes. Usually the before mentioned attributes are reserved for males. These MILFs know no taboos, they know no limits. They are the perfect sex partners.
So modern life restarts at 40 and a gray society needs to tell itself it’s still capable and interesting. It’s a mutual lie and effort to push the boundaries of age and dissolve old limits and taboos.
In a way it’s almost like the sexual egos of mature women are fighting against the menopause: "Look I still can get semen, I am still adorable! And with Science I am gonna kick your ass Mother Nature!"
The new Breeders on the Block
Pregnant at 40+ and loving it!
In the past women past the magic age of 40 were left alone, because they were heading straight for their menopause and were therefore uninteresting as breeding material. Just wait a few more years and these women are great grandmother material.
But thanks to science, overall better health and life expectancy breeding for women after 40 is now pretty normal. And many young women prefer postpone babies longer and longer, so 35+ mothers are becoming the norm in western societies instead or rare exceptions.
And breeding can now be outsourced to a "working womb" if necessary. All you need to do is freeze your eggs in the right age and "seed" them if you are ready and rich enough to have your own kids.
So science has helped to beat the biological clock in some aspects and women can now have babies - apart from the very popular game of international adoption - in almost any age.
Guardian: Pregnancy among over-40s reaches ‘record high’
Let’s get some Sex in the City - and expand our current idea about society
Let’s celebrate mature female consumerism and neurotic obsessions with the perfect wedding!
Conclusions?
In some way mature women are now doing the same what mature guys have been doing for ages: get out and have some fun with younger flesh. The TV shows are mostly about the usual "Relationship Porn" we love to watch (and stuff like Big Brother is the ultimate Social Porn anyway).
But the big picture is more complex: our aging societies are trying to cope with age and longevity. Behind all the modern media hype are serious questions: How do we live our lives NOT as passive grandmothers and grandfathers?
Most western people won’t have kids or grandkids when they cross the 40’s. There will be no families to fall back on - and often not even relationships - so we need new ways to socialize, form relationships on every level and "grow".
Why wait for death when you are just 40 - when your life expectancy is beyond 80? This is just the middle of your life Darling!
The old pensioner is gone - the next generation of "oldies" will be more demanding, self centered and active. Science will try to keep them "awake" and active much longer. And since our population pyramid is so skewed we need mature people to work longer and harder.
That is why the old cliches about mature women (and men) are under attack and are currently reformulated (even on trivial levels): It’s ok to have fun beyond 40, it’s ok to fuck beyond 40 and it’s probably necessary to have kids beyond 40.
That is why our societies needs to be open minded and explore about new "phases" in our lives: start a new life with 40 or a family. Since we all will last beyond the age of 70 or 80 it’s important to allow ourselves to have many "phases" in one life - and not being condemned to one "path" one has chosen in her or his twenties or thirties.
